Frank Beamer's Neck

Everyone knows a grown man can’t bring a glove to the game, but this fucker took it to the next level and you kind of have to respect his dedication here. Just trucking the shit out of some little girl on the monster and making the ill stab. Can’t knock the hustle.

Poop Face

NEW YORK (AP) — Bird poop for beauty? That’s what goes into facials at a luxury spa where the traditional Japanese treatment using imported Asian nightingale excrement mixed with rice bran goes for $180 a pop. About 100 women and men go into the Shizuka New York skin care salon each month to get the treatment, which is promoted as a way to keep the face soft and smooth using an enzyme in the poop to gently exfoliate the skin.


This is exactly why the terrorists hate us. They’re all holed up in caves with no plumbing or running water while we’re over here paying asians 180 bucks a whack to rub bird shit on our faces. Sucks to be them. God Bless America.

Recorder facial fa dayz

obsexxed:

Carol Seleme


#OMG

obsexxed:

Carol Seleme

#OMG

Ron Artest plays just 12 days after arthroscopic knee surgery because he’s too sexy for his cat

Artest

Yahoo - Los Angeles Lakers forward Metta World Peace achieved a fairly incredible feat on Tuesday night, playing 15 minutes of his team’s 104-96 win over the New Orleans Hornets just 12 days after surgery on his left knee.

“Well, you know, I’m just too sexy for my cat. I’m too sexy for my cat. My cat. I’m just too sexy for my cat. If I wasn’t as sexy for my cat, I probably wouldn’t have came back. I’m so sexy, I came back. Too sexy for my cat, too sexy to wear a sleeve or a bracelet [on my knee], so I had to come back. I felt sexy, I felt like my team was working, I felt like we wanted it. We just wanted to come together collectively. Play hard, do it together. … I’m definitely too sexy for my cat, definitely, we know that. I’m also too tough to let a meniscus surgery keep me out for six weeks. I’m too sexy for the cat.”

We must note that this phrase is not utter nonsense — it’s actually a line from one-hit wonder Right Said Fred’s 1991 smash “I’m Too Sexy.” For those too young to remember, the song is about a man so sexy that he cannot function in the world.

I’m pretty sure the proper lyrics are “I’m too sexy for my hat,” Ron. I mean, I’m 100% straight so I’ve never heard of Right Said Fred, but if I had heard of him I could guarantee that he doesn’t say “I’m too sexy for my cat.” Nice try Ron, nice try.

Things to take away from this Bruins shootout victory over the Jets

This image is not from today's game. It is from 1/11/12.

  1. Rask has looked outstanding so far. Tuukka time indeed.
  2. Tyler Seguin has added some muscle and seems to be throwing his body around a little bit more. Very nice to see from the speedy forward. Kid has all the skill in the world, good seeing him add to his game in this regard.
  3. Dougie Hamilton is the real deal. This kid is the puck moving PP defenseman that the Bruins have needed for a while. Seidenberg went down, and Hamilton looked really nice out there alongside Zdeno Chara. I’m excited to watch him progress as he gets more acclimated to the pro game.
  4. Patrice Bergeron is still the most underrated player in the league. Selke trophy or not, this kid needs more national recognition.
  5. The refs may still be a little rusty. Absolutely horrible call on Chara at the end of overtime there.
  6. PK has been very strong so far. PP looks better, but still looks like a work in progress. Will be interested to watch Dougie Hamilton’s impact on the PP as he matures.

And the most obvious but also most important thing of all: 2-0 with 4 out of a possible 4 points.

Thank God for hockey. I’m still a little butthurt over that Pats loss, but this certainly helps soothe the pain. Hockey is back indeed.

I. Can’t. Stop. Valerie Malone FTW.

I. Can’t. Stop. Valerie Malone FTW.

Like I said: Kelly Kapowski hasn’t lost a single MPH off of her fastball.

Like I said: Kelly Kapowski hasn’t lost a single MPH off of her fastball.

Kelly Kapowski hasn’t lost a single MPH off of her fastball

TAT

Are you kidding me right now? A picture of a fully covered woman hasn’t made my dick move this much since before the whole youporn era. Kelly Kapowsky? Valerie Malone? This chick was a life changer for a young Frank Beamers Neck. I’ve probably beat off to her more times than anyone else in my life. I used to watch 90210 just to load the spankbank with images of this beautiful creation. I Can’t believe she is still bringing the heat like this. #LOVE